As increasing numbers of brides are now writing and delivering their own words to guests. We reveal how you can own the mic with the perfect bride wedding speech on your big day.
The Dos & Don’ts of a Bride Wedding Speech
An important part of your wedding day is, of course, the speeches. Whether they’re filled with heart-warming words, lots of laughter, or simply they’re an entertainment factor.
“I’m seeing more and more women get in touch than ever before,” says speechwriter Adrian Simpson, whose company All Speeches Great And Small aims to help amateur orators sound like themselves ‘on a really good day’.
Whatever the running order, speeches need to be well planned. The good news is that women do tend, in Simpson’s experience, to be more organised. Whoever is doing a speech has all eyes on them, and the pressure can certainly build up. As the bride, you especially want to top the best man’s speech!
How To Write a Bride’s Speech
The time has come for you to write your speech. But guests look forward to this part of the wedding day and can have high expectations, whether that’s for heart-warming words, lots of laughter, or simply just the entertainment factor. In this case, you will certainly be feeling the pressure – not to mention, all eyes are on you.
As the bride, you want to top the best man’s speech and show your guests that you can confidently deliver something that will leave the crowd laughing. Here, we’ve provided you with tips to help you and relieve some of the nerves you will be feeling.
1. Remember the element of surprise
The advantage that you have for your speech is that you know your spouse better than anyone else. Romantic relationships unlock a side to us that no one else sees, especially when living together.
And whether it reveals their good qualities or frustrating habits, you’re bound to have some embarrassing stories about them. Revealing something unknown to the guests will also provide a shock factor to add to the laughter, ensuring that you take the crown for the best speech.
2. Inside jokes are a no-go
It’s essential to avoid any inside jokes. Whether it’s between you and your partner or perhaps your circle of friends, the rest of the guests aren’t going to understand the joke.
Thus, you won’t get many laughs, instead, you’ll most likely hear crickets. But this doesn’t mean you can’t include jokes in your speech, they’re a great addition to keep the giggles going.
But instead, keep it generic enough to stay relevant to your crowd, but not too much so that it sounds like you’ve browsed the web for it – there’ll be no awkward silences this way.
3. Avoid inappropriate content
Don’t try to outdo the best man’s speech by including anything that could be considered too much information. What some may find entertaining, others may find inappropriate – particularly the groom’s family.
And keeping it tasteful doesn’t mean it can’t be hilarious, consider some funny memories from the start of your relationship that will put a smile on the families’ faces, rather than making them feel uncomfortable.
4. Relieve your stress
It’s normal to be feeling the heat in the lead-up to your speech. But confidence is key when it comes to public speaking, particularly when you’re aiming to make your guests laugh until they cry.
If you don’t sound confident in your jokes, your guests won’t feel it either, so you may just see some puzzled faces. But how are you supposed to ease your nerves before speaking in front of a crowd?
Just a short 10-minute walk is enough to relieve your stress, according to a 2018 study. Set some time aside on the morning of your wedding to do this, perhaps before you begin to get ready.
Not only will this help with your speech, but it will also relax you for the whole day ahead. And shortly before your speech, a glass of prosecco will of course give you some Dutch courage.
5. Stay in touch with your emotions
Humour may not be your forte, so you may be tempted to devote most of your attention to perfecting it. But it is your wedding day after all, so it’s important to display your affection towards your partner, as well as your loved ones who have supported you on your journey.
Don’t forget to include some special memories that you and your partner have shared as a way of expressing your gratitude towards them, you might even see your guests shed some tears from being so touched. This way, you’re giving the best of both worlds in your speech, so you can be confident knowing you’ll have impressed the crowd.
More Bride Speech Tips
Your wedding day is a magnificent moment that you will never forget, but that isn’t to say that it’s stress-free.
And to add to the stressful planning, you must create a memorable speech that will impress your guests. But with these tips, you will undoubtedly be the talk of the celebration.
How Long Should a Bride Wedding Speech be?
The UK often follows the Americans’ slick lead when it comes to weddings, and Simpson concedes that they’re on the right track when it comes to speeches, especially in terms of timekeeping.
“In the US, they agree on length beforehand,” he says. “Speechmakers are given three or four minutes. We don’t do that. But now that there are more speeches, everyone needs to be quicker.”
Simpson recommends seven minutes or ’10 max’ for any speech to avoid guest boredom and resentment.
Bride Speech Subjects
If a bride chooses to make a speech, the first thing she should do is discuss what subjects with her husband-to-be, so they don’t go over the same ground in terms of their thank-yous.
This, says Simpson, should happen among all the speechmakers before a wedding anyway. So, after thank-yous, what should you be talking about? Your beloved, of course! Their quirks are a welcome topic, especially if it come with a healthy dollop of humour.
Things that should never be said? “Never use it as an opportunity to air laundry. It might only last a few minutes, but people can remember speeches forever.”
Although tradition dictates that the groom toasts the bridesmaids, it’s likely that a bride will want to talk about her friends too.
Wedding Poems for Bride Speeches
A poem can work really nicely – but it’s got to pretty blooming good! Poetry can be cringeworthy at the best of times, so unless you’re supremely confident in your writing skills, it’s probably not the best time to channel your inner Pam Ayres.
The most important thing to remember is to speak slowly, with poise and purpose. Dispel any anxiety by focusing on your new spouse; they’re the reason you’re making a speech in the first place.
And remember, you’re not an actor or comic – you’re you, on the best the day of your life. Speak from the heart and you won’t go far wrong!
Dos and Don’ts for Bride Speech Making
- Do confer with other speechmakers well in advance to ensure you aren’t all covering the same ground
- Do speak slowly and take your time
- Don’t feel you have to make ‘gags’ with a punchline
- Do keep your speech sub-10 minutes. No matter how good it is, you don’t want to run the risk of boring the wedding party and guests
- Don’t just list people you’d like to thank – add texture to your speech with anecdotes
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