Keep on the good side of your bride-to-be and make sure that you’re not falling prey to some of these five common mistakes that grooms make.
Letting the bride do all the work
Okay, so the bride has probably been thinking about her wedding, since before you proposed, how it’s going to look and what she’s going to wear. But you also need to take responsibility for some of the wedding planning.
Give some input on the guest list – who you want to invite and who you can do without.
Next you’ll need to decide on a venue together. She wants a country-style wedding and you fancy running off and getting married on a tropical beach. You’re going to need to meet one another halfway on this one (and we’re not talking mid-Atlantic).
You’re also going to need to discuss your wedding date together. You can’t just pick a date at random and expect it’s going to suit. The date of when you’ll get married with drastically affects costs – if you marry midweek in winter it’s probably going to be far less expensive than marrying on a Saturday in the height of summer. And if you’re planning your wedding last minute you’ll find a midweek date more available to you.
What we’re saying is don’t be uncommunicative – get involved. That will mean you’ll have bigger a say in the things that matter to you.
Getting involved at the last minute
Don’t wait until the last minute to have your say. Don’t let your bride plan everything and then the day before the wedding start criticising or trying to change her plans.
Like mistake number one, keep involved throughout the lead-up, have your say, try to be enthusiastic about things and keep talking about the planning!
Not getting involved with the gift list
The thought of going to a department store and trawling through kitchenware might seem boring but you need to take more than a passing interest.
Cosy up together with your laptop, chat about what you think you’d like and you’ll get some serious brownie points with the Mrs. Just don’t ignore it – in fact you might find you enjoy choosing gifts more than you think.
Your gift list can be anything you want – sets of luggage, garden furniture, power tools, even money towards your honeymoon – it’s not all about saucepans and crockery any more.
Turning into a Groomzilla
Don’t obsess about your wedding, there needs to be a balance. You’ve probably encountered Bridezilla during the planning stages – well you don’t want to become a Groomzilla about the whole day either.
Don’t out-do the bride – try to divide up what you’re both taking care of, don’t obsess over the details too much – like how many roses are going to be in the bride’s bouquet and how many bridesmaids she should have. Let her have her say, too!
Forgetting to have fun
You’re planning a wedding, not a conference or business event. It’s supposed to be the best day of your life and a party.
Again, make sure you get involved with the guestlist so that people that you really want to be there don’t get forgotten. Think about whether you want to have a live DJ or band or both if your budget will stretch to that. The sort of music you want them to play and the sort of atmosphere you want the evening to have. It’s always good to have an open bar – at least up until a certain point.
Finally, we’d recommend that you don’t have your stag do the night before your wedding. Hold it at least a week before to allow any hangovers to dissipate and respect any lines your fiancée has drawn regarding activities. You know what we mean…